Lyrics, licks and lies, lies, lies

Tuesday, October 11, 2005

Where's My Fucking Record Contract?

Abercrombie and Fitch
Gives me an itch
I want to scratch.
Corporation boy-bands
Give me a plan
I want to hatch
I would like to take you somewhere.
I would like to (Just don’t go there).
I would like to put my hands
Inside those low-slung cargo pants
And dance.

Shave a monkey and put it on a stage.
Manufacture adolescent rage.
Nu-metal. Nu-buck.
Why don’t you just take it out and fuck.

All the girls and boys,
They are just toys,
So squeaky clean.
All the boys and girls,
They don’t take pills
Or anything obscene.
I would like to change the station.
Radio Free Masturbation.
I would like to say right here
That N-Synch are all fucking queer
To me.

Shave a monkey and put it on a stage.
Manufacture adolescent rage.
Nu-metal. Nu-buck.
Why don’t you just take it out and fuck.

If I were pretty I would demonstrate,
But I’m no model and
The rest of them are straight.

Shave a monkey and put it on a stage.
Manufacture adolescent rage.
Nu-metal. Nu-buck.
Why don’t you just take it out and fuck.

Iggy Pop was there
In underwear
Ten years ago (and more).
G.G. Allen is gone
And still puts on
A more exciting show.
I would like to play with Hanson,
In a set with Charlie Manson.
I would make them understand
What makes a boy become a man.
(Nice tan.)

Shave a monkey and put it on a stage.
Manufacture adolescent rage.
Nu-metal. Nu-buck.
Why don’t you just take it out and...
Shave a monkey and put it on a stage.
Nice voice. Right age.
You’re Tom. I’m Huck.
Why don’t we just take it out and fuck.

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